Only When I Lose Myself

"Only When I Lose Myself" is a song by English electronic music band Depeche Mode. It was made exclusively for their 1998 compilation The Singles 86>98 and released as a single on 7 September 1998. It is the first non-album studio single since "It's Called a Heart" in 1985 and is also one of the rare singles to have two limited editions ("L" and "XL" – the others being "Enjoy the Silence", "In Your Room" and "Suffer Well").

"Only When I Lose Myself"
Single by Depeche Mode
from the album The Singles 86>98
B-side	"Surrender" "Headstar"
Released	7 September 1998 (1998-09-07)
Genre	Alternative rock[1] trip hop[2]
Length	4:41 (album version) 4:34 (single version) 3:52 (radio edit)
Label	Mute
Songwriter(s)	Martin L. Gore
Producer(s)	Tim Simenon
Depeche Mode singles chronology
"Useless" (1997) "Only When I Lose Myself" (1998) "Dream On" (2001)
Music video
"Only When I Lose Myself" on YouTube

Release

There are two B-sides on the single. "Surrender" was the first exclusive vocal B-side since "My Joy" in 1993 from the "Walking in My Shoes" single, and the other is an instrumental titled "Headstar". A rare remix of "Painkiller" from 1997 was re-released as a B-side on some versions. The release also includes a new remix of "World in My Eyes".

Music video

The music video for "Only When I Lose Myself" was directed by Brian Griffin, who had previously worked with Depeche Mode as a photographer, and did the cover art for Depeche Mode's first five albums. The soundtrack to the video is a unique version of the song, fading out at the last chorus and omitting the instrumental outro (like the radio version), but including the instrumental intro (which is missing from the radio version).

Track listing

All songs were written by Martin L. Gore

UK and Australian CD1[3][4] "Only When I Lose Myself" "Surrender" "Headstar" UK and Australian CD2; UK 12-inch single[5][6][7] "Only When I Lose Myself" (Subsonic Legacy remix) "Only When I Lose Myself" (Dan the Automator remix) "Headstar" (Luke Slater remix) UK and Australian CD3[8][9] "Only When I Lose Myself (Gus Gus Long Play mix) "Painkiller" (Kill the Pain mix – DJ Shadow vs Depeche Mode) "Surrender" (Catalan FC Out of Reach mix) "Only When I Lose Myself" (Gus Gus Short Play mix) "World in My Eyes" (Safar mix) UK limited-edition 12-inch single[10] A1. "Only When I Lose Myself (Gus Gus Long Play mix) B1. "Painkiller" (Kill the Pain mix – DJ Shadow vs Depeche Mode) B2. "Surrender" (Catalan FC Out of Reach mix) UK cassette single[11] A1. "Only When I Lose Myself" A2. "Surrender" A3. "Headstar" B1. "Only When I Lose Myself" (Subsonic Legacy remix) B2. "Only When I Lose Myself" (Automator remix) B3. "Headstar" (Luke Slater remix)

US and Canadian maxi-CD single (grey cover)[12][13] "Only When I Lose Myself" (Dan the Automator remix) – 4:56 "Headstar" – 4:25 "Surrender" – 6:17 "Only When I Lose Myself" (Subsonic Legacy remix) – 7:03 "Headstar" (Luke Slater remix) – 5:47 US and Canadian maxi-CD single (green cover)[14][15] "Only When I Lose Myself" (Gus Gus Longplay mix) – 11:18 "Painkiller" (Kill the Pain mix – DJ Shadow vs Depeche Mode) – 6:31 "Surrender" (Catalan FC Out of Reach mix) – 6:54 "Only When I Lose Myself" (Gus Gus Short Play mix) – 4:58 "World in My Eyes" (Safar mix) – 8:30 US 2×12-inch single[16] A1. "Only When I Lose Myself" (Dan the Automator remix) – 4:56 A2. "Painkiller" (Kill the Pain mix – DJ Shadow vs Depeche Mode) – 6:31 B1. "Headstar" (Luke Slater remix) – 5:47 B2. "Surrender" (Catalan FC Out of Reach mix) – 6:54 C1. "Only When I Lose Myself" (Gus Gus Longplay mix) – 11:18 C2. "Headstar" – 4:23 D1. "Only When I Lose Myself" (Subsonic Legacy remix) – 7:00 D2. "Surrender" – 6:18

Charts

Weekly charts Weekly chart performance for "Only When I Lose Myself" Chart (1998) Peak position Australia (ARIA)[17] 34 Austria (Ö3 Austria Top 40)[18] 10 Belgium (Ultratip Bubbling Under Flanders)[19] 17 Belgium (Ultratop 50 Wallonia)[20] 37 Canada (Nielsen SoundScan)[21] 5 Canada Rock/Alternative (RPM)[22] 7 Denmark (Tracklisten)[23] 1 Europe (Eurochart Hot 100 Singles)[24] 11 Finland (Suomen virallinen lista)[25] 4 France (SNEP)[26] 29 Germany (GfK)[27] 2 Hungary (Single Top 40)[28] 1 Ireland (IRMA)[29] 28 Italy (FIMI)[30] 3 Netherlands (Single Top 100)[31] 89 Norway (VG-lista)[32] 14 Scotland (OCC)[33] 20 Spain (AFYVE)[23] 1 Sweden (Sverigetopplistan)[34] 4 Switzerland (Schweizer Hitparade)[35] 16 UK Singles (OCC)[36] 17 UK Indie (OCC)[37] 4 US Billboard Hot 100[38] 61 US Alternative Airplay (Billboard)[39] 36 US Dance Singles Sales (Billboard)[40] 2

Year-end charts Year-end chart performance for "Only When I Lose Myself" Chart (1998) Position Germany (Official German Charts)[41] 77 Sweden (Sverigetopplistan)[42] 94 US Maxi-Singles Sales (Billboard)[43] 13 Chart (1999) Position US Maxi-Singles Sales (Billboard)[44] 44

Release history

Region	Date	Format(s)	Label(s)	Ref.
United Kingdom	7 September 1998	12-inch vinyl CD1 CD2	Mute	[45]
United States	15 September 1998	CD	Mute Reprise	[46]
Canada	22 September 1998			[47]
United Kingdom	28 September 1998	CD3	Mute	[48]

References

1. "The 88 Best Alternative Rock Songs of 1998". Spin. p. 4. Retrieved 18 September 2020.
2. Lemieux, Kelly (26 November 1998). "In a Depeche Mode". Westword. Retrieved 26 January 2020.
3. Only When I Lose Myself (UK CD1 liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records. 1998. CDBong29.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
4. Only When I Lose Myself (Australian CD1 liner notes). Depeche Mode. Liberation Records, Mute Records. 1998. MUSH01781.2.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
5. Only When I Lose Myself (UK CD2 liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records. 1998. LCDBong29.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
6. Only When I Lose Myself (Australian CD2 liner notes). Depeche Mode. Liberation Records, Mute Records. 1998. MUSH01781.5.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
7. Only When I Lose Myself (UK 12-inch single sleeve). Depeche Mode. Mute Records. 1998. 12Bong29.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
8. Only When I Lose Myself (UK CD3 liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records. 1998. XLCDBong29.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
9. Only When I Lose Myself (Australian CD3 liner notes). Depeche Mode. Liberation Records, Mute Records. 1998. MUSH01781.3.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
10. Only When I Lose Myself (UK limited 12-inch single sleeve). Depeche Mode. Mute Records. 1998. L12Bong29.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
11. Only When I Lose Myself (UK cassette single sleeve). Depeche Mode. Mute Records. 1998. C Bong 29.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
12. Only When I Lose Myself (US maxi-CD single liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records, Reprise Records. 1998. 9 44546-2.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
13. Only When I Lose Myself (Canadian maxi-CD single liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records, Reprise Records. 1998. CD 44546.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
14. Only When I Lose Myself (US maxi-CD single liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records, Reprise Records. 1998. 9 44562-2.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
15. Only When I Lose Myself (Canadian maxi-CD single liner notes). Depeche Mode. Mute Records, Reprise Records. 1998. CD 44562.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
16. Only When I Lose Myself (US 2×12-inch single vinyl disc). Depeche Mode. Mute Records, Reprise Records. 1998. 9 44562-0.{{cite AV media notes}}: CS1 maint: others in cite AV media (notes) (link)
17. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself". ARIA Top 50 Singles.
18. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself" (in German). Ö3 Austria Top 40.
19. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself" (in Dutch). Ultratip.
20. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself" (in French). Ultratop 50.
21. "Depeche Mode Chart History (Canadian Digital Songs)". Billboard. Retrieved 10 November 2019.
22. "Top RPM Rock/Alternative Tracks: Issue 703." RPM. Library and Archives Canada. Retrieved 7 November 2018.
23. "Top National Sellers" (PDF). Music & Media. Vol. 15, no. 40. 3 October 1998. p. 15. OCLC 29800226 – via World Radio History.
24. "Eurochart Hot 100 Singles" (PDF). Music & Media. Vol. 15, no. 40. 3 October 1998. p. 13. OCLC 29800226 – via World Radio History.
25. "Depeche Mode: Only When I Lose Myself" (in Finnish). Musiikkituottajat.
26. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself" (in French). Les classement single.
27. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself" (in German). GfK Entertainment charts.
28. "Top National Sellers" (PDF). Music & Media. Vol. 15, no. 39. 26 September 1998. p. 12. OCLC 29800226 – via World Radio History.
29. "The Irish Charts – Search Results – Only When I Lose Myself". Irish Singles Chart. Retrieved 11 January 2019.
30. "History" (in Italian). FIMI. Retrieved 2 June 2022. With "Ricerca per" set on "Titolo", search "Only When I Lose Myself" and then click "Classifiche".
31. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself" (in Dutch). Single Top 100.
32. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself". VG-lista.
33. "Official Scottish Singles Sales Chart Top 100". Official Charts Company. Retrieved 7 November 2018.
34. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself". Singles Top 100.
35. "Depeche Mode – Only When I Lose Myself". Swiss Singles Chart.
36. "Official Singles Chart Top 100". Official Charts Company.
37. "Official Independent Singles Chart Top 50". Official Charts Company. Retrieved 7 November 2018.
38. "Depeche Mode Chart History (Hot 100)". Billboard.
39. "Depeche Mode Chart History (Alternative Airplay)". Billboard.
40. "Depeche Mode Chart History (Dance Singles Sales)". Billboard. Retrieved 31 May 2022.
41. "Top 100 Single-Jahrescharts – 1998" (in German). GfK Entertainment. Retrieved 18 April 2018.
42. "Årslista Singlar, 1998" (in Swedish). Sverigetopplistan. Retrieved 14 May 2020.
43. "1988 The Year in Music: Hot Dance Maxi-Singles Sales". Billboard. Vol. 110, no. 52. 26 December 1998. p. YE-54. ISSN 0006-2510 – via Google Books.
44. "1999 The Year in Music: Hot Dance Maxi-Singles Sales". Billboard. Vol. 111, no. 52. 25 December 1999. p. YE-61.
45. "New Releases: Singles" (PDF). Music Week. 5 September 1998. p. 31. Retrieved 11 July 2021.
46. Sandiford-Waller, Theda (19 September 1998). "Hot 100 Spotlight". Billboard. Vol. 110, no. 38. p. 105. Also hitting stores Tuesday (15) are [...] and Depeche Mode's 'Only When I Lose Myself'...
47. "Album Releases: September 1998". Jam!. Archived from the original on 17 August 2000. Retrieved 5 January 2023.
48. "New Releases: Singles". Music Week. 26 September 1998. p. 33.

External links

• Single information from the official Depeche Mode website
• AllMusic review